The Sabina Nessa case shows nothing has changed since Sarah Everard’s murder

Don’t be fooled by the local officers handing out “safety sheets” in nearby areas or the council dispensing panic alarms.  There are now more patrolmen on foot in Kidbrooke, where Sabina lived, than ever. It won’t help.

When Sarah Everard was killed, police even went door to door, reportedly telling women the only way to ensure their safety was to stay in their homes (during a lockdown, no less), a tactic used during the Yorkshire Ripper days. 

Of course, that wouldn't work. It’s not even feasible, let alone reasonable.

Like many women, I live alone and don’t own a car. Does this mean that the only way to guarantee I stay alive is not to walk to the shops? Not to walk my dog?  Not to run for exercise? I guess I shouldn’t get supermarket deliveries either, as the drivers are typically men, as are most of my cab drivers. Where does that logic end?  At what point do I deserve the liberty to live my life without pervasive fear?

Last Friday, the day Sabina died, a report from the HMICFRS said that violence against women is not in the top three priorities for police departments in England and Wales. Why not? What will it take for the police and Government to make women’s lives a priority?

That our lives and safety aren’t prioritised is something women understand – we know we aren’t taken seriously while reporting crimes; reading about the obscenely low prosecution statistics for rape confirms that for us. There is a bigger fine for littering than harassing a woman on the street. A longer sentence is possible for stealing a dog than strangling a woman.  What are our lives worth? What is our safety worth? 

If the blame is put on us – for not following advice and staying in our homes – then the police departments and Government don’t have to take as much responsibility when we are murdered in public parks. They can just point to a crazed stranger or a one-off attack. Denying the epidemic of violence against women and the inherent misogyny in this society allows them to wash their hands of responsibility.

We also know that when the victim is a woman of colour, as in the case of Sabina Nessa, there is far less media coverage; much less outrage. The papers aren’t wallpapered with her face for weeks on end. But they should be. We should be up in arms that Sabina, who was contributing to educating children, has been taken from us and from her family.

Reading about Sabina’s family has broken me this morning. Her three sisters. That she was teaching English to adults outside her day job. That she loved cats. Her family and community will never be the same; she will never be a statistic to them. She will never just be another murdered woman and she shouldn’t be. To survive a pandemic and to be killed in an act of violence at the age of 28 is incomprehensible. 

Six months ago, seeing the news about Sarah, I couldn’t go about my regular life any more without doing something, without saying something, without fighting back, so I helped co-found Reclaim These Streets. But it is exhausting. More than 70 women have been killed at the hands of men during the past six months. I thought activism work would be empowering and fulfilling; mostly it is exhausting and depressing. Getting asked for comment when women are brutally raped or murdered. Knowing that another round of “thoughts and prayers” are coming without any meaningful change. I’m done with words. I want an actual plan from the Government. I want legislation to protect me. I want racism and sexism training within police departments. I want accountability and metrics on plans that police will be enacting to prove that my life and safety matter.

The only area of hope so far has been with Shout Out UK, who we partnered with to put on consent and education workshops as part of the RSE curriculum in schools. Teaching children and especially boys about respect and consent has felt like we could actually impact the way boys are thinking about their language and actions towards girls. Because violence against women and girls is a male problem. The only way men are going to stop killing women is if men address their behaviour and the behaviour of the men around them.

A sheet of paper on how to be safe is not going to protect us; our Government and police have not shown any actual plan on how they will protect us, and once again we will find ourselves back in this same position. A family mourning their beautiful daughter, who had a long life ahead of her, cut short. 

Tomorrow evening, I will be standing alongside the community of Kidbrooke to light a candle for Sabina Nessa. I will be arm in arm with the women of Reclaim These Streets. I will be offering condolences to her family. And continuing to demand that the Government and police actually do something about the epidemic of violence against women and girls in this country.